Where I Exist:: Work
Warp Mind:: cranky
Escape Piece:: Into the Ocean - Blue Monday
Fuck you, Nicole.
Under your spell again.
I can't say no to you.
Crave my heart and it's bleeding in your hand.
I can't say no to you.
Shouldn't have let you torture me so sweetly.
Now I can't let go of this dream.
I can't breathe but I feel...
I feel good enough for you.
Drink up sweet decadence.
I can't say no to you,
And I've completely lost myself, and I don't mind.
I can't say no to you.
Shouldn't let you conquer me completely.
Now I can't let go of this dream.
Can't believe that I feel...
I feel good enough.
It's been such a long time coming, but I feel good.
And I'm still waiting for the rain to fall.
Pour real life down on me.
'Cause I can't hold on to anything this good enough.
Am I good enough for you to love me too?
So take care what you ask of me,
'cause I can't say no.
I love you.
I just wanted to let you all know, those who love to share their art (stories, poetry, artwork) or you simply want to write a review on your favourite band, tv show, movie or music, you can do so now at a new community. link_lace.
It's just started so we're working out the kinks but please feel free to join. Don't forget to introduce yourself!
Yea, I know it's late. 3am late!! I'm sitting in the middle of the living room floor, in front of our 42" Plasma and looking up Amy Lee icons! Amanda is sitting on the couch playing OLD SCHOOL Zelda!! :D Earlier today, eh well, yesterday I guess? (Technically it's still today because we haven't slept yet) We decided it was time to treat ourselves so we went out and bought us a Nintendo Wii! It's fucking awesome! We just downloaded a few old school games (the first ever Donkey Kong, Zelda and Mario Kart for 64!) Good times are to be had!
So, what is like weather-wise where you are? Right now, it's SNOWING!!! Still!! It's been snowing for over a few days straight now!! Warmer, but still snowing. Lots of snow. Makes me want to go sliding at the Golf Course hill!! Oouuu down suicide hill muahaha. . . only not with a crazy carpet or saucer this time. I'd definitely use a GT! lol
What else is new? I'm back into writing! Yep, you heard it here . . . I am now being bit by the muse bug. She decided to light a fire under my ass and I'm getting back into my lovely story, Addicted. I haven't worked on it today, however, with the excitement of a new Nintendo Wii and all! :D hehe, it's great. Uh, writing and the wii!
Amanda and I have an amazing marriage. We are so completely happy and you know, I wouldn't trade any of the good and bad moments. She completes me and I'm truly lucky to have her. I love you baby! (Just wanted to give a shout out to my Belle ;) Why? Because it's my LJ and I can. If you don't like it, grab a spoon and eat my ass!) Hmm . . . channeled Stifler and Amanda there! HEHE
Well . . .
It's late, as I've mentioned and a few more minutes on this thing, I guarantee you I'll no longer make sense!
Allrighty all you people!
Well Amanda and I were going through some old entries last night on her journal. If you weren't on her friend list you wouldn't be able to see it but anyway . . . it just amazes us how obvious we were back in 2004 yet so fucking clueless at the same time. LOL heh
Anyway, after reading, we went to bed and cuddled. We started talking about a certain situation. She was working in a different part of Texas, about an hour away from her apartment, and I asked her what she thought would've happened between us if I went to visit her while she was in the hotel there. Needless to say I already knew the answer. CLothes would've been everywhere and she would be either late for work or absent ;) lol. But still, it was a question I wanted to hear the answer too so I know I wouldn't be the only one thinking about what I knew what would happen. (Wow, if that doesn't make sense to you, trust me, it does to me LMAO)
So laying in bed last night, after talking there was silence, a very comfortable silence. Then, I pulled myself slightly over her, rubbing that soft skin on her side and asked her if I could kiss her. She replied with a purred "mmhmmm" so I did.
It was hungry. It was raw. It was primal. We had one of the most amazing primal love making sessions ever. I mean, it was intense and so fucking amazing. *smiles* Don't worry, I won't go into any detail.
I slept like a baby and right now, it's safe to say I feel as if I fell in love for the first time all over again. This feeling is wonderful and it feels good to have that new feeling come back every once in a while. You know that feeling, the tingly feeling inside your chest when you were just told that that special person is in love with you. The moment you become girlfriends or even after the very first time you express your love physically.
So Amanda Nickole, thank you for giving me a world full of love, laughter and happiness. You truly are the woman of my dreams and I'll forever cherish every past, present and future moment we will had/have together. I'm so in love with you babygirl. You have to know that I would in no way, cause you harm or hurt you in anyway. You are my reason for being here. You are the only reason I wake up with a smile everyday.
I Love You
I know, it's been awhile, AGAIN.
I guess you can say that I've steered myself away from this place. Or perhaps it is the journal? I don't know. I'm not sure.
In any case, I hope you all are having a great life! I hope things are working out and that the New Year gave you positive outlook on what's to come.
I had a blast at the Evanescence concert Jan 13th. Seriously, I was so excited and happy, it felt really good. Amy Lee is much more beautiful in person, not that I met her face to face but I did see her on stage! :D They are the coolest band ever. Thank you Amber for giving us the opportunity to have these tickets and thank you to my Amanda for surprising me with them! :D
I've given my two weeks notice at work in hopes to find something less demanding and part time. I'm hoping for the best and that I'll be happier in that new work environment.
Anyway, I just wanted to say that I'm still here. There. Sometimes I'm nowhere. . . but alas, I'm still *here*. :)
. . . freaking out for more than one reason.
1). EVANESCENCE CONCERT IN TWO MORE DAYS NOT COUNTING TODAY!!! :P
2.) I'M UNHAPPY. No!! I don't mean with my love life, my marriage or my friends. Trust me, Amanda is the ONLY person that's keeping me grounded and safe. She's my lifeline and my backbone. Without her . . . who knows where I'd be right now?
I'm just saying I'm not very happy with choices I'm about to make.
3.) I REALLY have to pee and my fucking cocksucker of a BOSS is upstairs doing what the fuck ever with his wife (GROSS) and I'm down here with a customer.
- I guess you now know part of the reason I'm unhappy - WORK.
It's hard trying to find a job here right now. It sucks honestly.
OF COURSE!!! It's 2007! Happy belated New Year to ALL!!
Well, I just came on here to let ya'll know that I'm still alive and I'm still very much in love, married and most of all, HAPPY!!
This time next Saturday, Amanda and I will be fucking rocking it out at an EVANESCENCE concert!!!!! I'm so fucking excited, you have NO idea. Amy Lee and us in the same room . . . (granted with thousands of others) but hey, Amanda and I can only dream about it being just the three of us ;)
Anyway, I'll DEFINITELY let you know how that one turns out! =D
I LOVE YOU AMANDA!!!
We've been waiting for a while now. He's been in the hospital for weeks, it was just a matter of time. He was suffering, I know this, but it's still sad knowing Death claimed another person in my family.
Early this morning, my grandfather passed away. He's now in a better place - at least that's what I want to believe. He's somewhere with my dad and his other daughter (who passed away when she was a baby).
It's still sad, even though I know it was the best thing. I mean, it's never the best thing ti die, but in his state, he really needed to let go. He needed to say goodbye to this cold world and say hello to, hopefully, a warmer and peaceful one.
I've bared my heart out this morning with tears. Alone in the apartment. Sometimes I think it's foolish to cry, I just have so many emotions running through me right now.
( A Short Letter For Grandpa DigCollapse )
Right now, I'm in the back office at Lowery's. I'm not good at being alone when I have these emotions running through me. Plus Amanda helps me deal with things about myself so much better than I am. Love is spectacular. =)
I'm signing off now. Try not to think. This makes me miss my dad even more. Isn't that . . . odd? I hope not.
I love you Amanda